the taehyikes archive

of very dumb shit

hey! welcome to hell an archive of my work!a quick reminder before you tread further: if you're a minor, please leave! this is a 18+ space! do not follow/do not interact/have a nice day remember to be kind to yourself ok get outok, now that it's just adults heyyy click the links up top for more Stuff, i worked very hard on organzing everything <3


commissions status: closed




who IS taehyikes

anne
she/her, white, '94
i can think of nothing else to say about myself


just some questions i get dm'd about a lot!

do you allow translations?sorry, but no!


do you allow podfic/fanart of your work?yes! this is my blanket permission! (and i'm honored)


do you take commissions?sometimes! i'll periodically post when i have new slots open, i basically try to only accept a few at a time so i don't get overwhelmed. if you aren't sure if i currently have any slots open, feel free to dm me and i'll let you know! i'll also update the home page of this carrd to say when they're open!


why did you block me?i block people who:1) i see dogpiling/bullying/being a jerk to other people
2) have quote retweeted/replied to one of my au tweets with something rude
3) rate fics in their rec threads (even if u give me a good rating! if i see u gave someone else like a 3/5 stars then i'll block because what the heck!! don't rate ppl's fics! be nice, people do this for free!)
4) are minors/don't have an age in their bios and try to follow me after i've soft blocked you multiple times
i don't use mass blocking tools so if you're blocked it was for a reason and i won't unblock!


what apps do you use to make social media aus?i use social maker and social dummy! but neither are on the app store anymore because of new regulations or something like that so i think they only exist on the black market now tbh


art:
art inspired by my aus :')


master thread:


fics sorted by pairings

(updated regularly)

  • each pairing is divided into main pairing, side pairing, and one shots

  • ao3 fics have red links

  • twitter fic/social media aus have blue links

  • some fics are cross-posted and have links to both twitter and ao3, depending on your reading preference

  • all happy endings

  • one shots are 1-2 post social media aus/prompts


namjoon pairings


seokjin pairings


yoongi pairings


hoseok pairings


jimin pairings


taehyung pairings


jungkook pairings


genfic


jungkook-centric sick ficlength: 500~ words


just a little hobi-centric appreciationlength: 1 post


everyone just really loves when namjoon wears jortslength: 2 posts


seokjin is very bufflength: 1 post


poly


main poly


namjoon and yoongi are both in unrequited love with their roommate and find ways to commiserate about ityoongi/namjoon/hoseok
length: 44 posts


hobi wears denim and ot6 try and fail to copeot7
length: 14 posts


art heist au; hoseok gathers together the best of the bestot7
length: 2.7k words


one shot


namjoon goes away on a business trip for a few days and yoonmin attempt to distract themselves from missing him too muchnamgimin


side poly


namjin au where namjoon loses his glasses and gets himself into a sticky situationmain pairing: namjoon/seokjin
side: vminkook
length: 21 posts


a partridge in a pear treeyoongi and seokjin are roommates, and it takes a little holiday spirit for them to see that maybe they could be moremain pairing: seokjin/yoongi
side: vminkook & namseok
length: 19.8k words


namgi au where yoongi is a shy tree nymph and namjoon is confused why trees keep appearing outside his apartment doormain pairing: yoongi/namjoon
side: vminhope & jinkook
length: 29 posts


yoonkook au where yoongi decides to rent a cabin in the mountains to work on his next novel, and jungkook runs the general store in a nearby villagemain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side: minjoon & taejinseok
length: 460 posts


taejoon au where namjoon is a curator interested in taehyung’s art, and taehyung is an artist interested in namjoon’s uhhh intellectmain pairing: namjoon/taehyung
side: yoonminkook
length: 14 posts


namjin


main pairing


namjoon looks at the moon every night because it fills him with a feeling of serenity. seokjin (aka the man on the moon) thinks namjoon is looking at him, so he decides to flirt backnamjoon/seokjin
length: 15 posts


seokjin accuses namjoon of stealing his twitter caption and won’t leave him alone until he gets his royalty feesnamjoon/seokjin
length: 9 posts


potato gun salesman seokjin tries to sell his product to unsuspecting potato farmer and self proclaimed potato advocate namjoonnamjoon/seokjin
side pairings: sope & taekook
length: 64 posts


namjoon loses his glasses and gets himself into a sticky situationnamjoon/seokjin
side pairing: vminkook
length: 21 posts


one shot


the astroid-proof boy scouts are an elite space team, sent to mars to prep the planet for human occupancynamjoon/seokjin


side pairing


yoongi decides to sail across the globe for 6 months, and in his first port city he matches with jungkook on tindermain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: namjin & vmin
length: 477 posts


sequel to sailor au
jungkook just wants to make their 6 month anniversary as special as possible
main pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: vmin & namjin
length: 32 posts


yoongi is famous rapper agust d, jimin is a popular tv presenter/singer, and after their awkward meeting on a music show, yoongi lowkey starts releasing extremely Explicit songs about a mystery manmain pairing: yoongi/jimin
side pairings: namjin & vhope
length: 140 posts


the kids are righttaehyung and yoongi get stuck on a ski lift together. twice.main pairing: yoongi/taehyung
side pairing: namjin
length: 12.8k words


namgi


main pairing


yoongi forces his friends to send flattering pictures of himself to their group chat in a (not) subtle attempt to seduce namjoonyoongi/namjoon
side pairings: vmin & jinkook
length: 28 posts


yoongi is a shy tree nymph and namjoon is confused why trees keep appearing outside his apartment dooryoongi/namjoon
side pairings: vminhope & jinkook
length: 29 posts


one shot


yoongi comes to work and finds little snow ducks waiting for himnamjoon/yoongi


namseok


main pairing


a cute stranger sits down at namjoon’s table not realizing it’s occupied, and namjoon handles the unexpected company as best as he can (i.e. poorly)namjoon/hoseok
length: 21 posts


side pairing


twitter exists in ancient greece, jungkook is hercules, and yoongi is an annoyed citizen who just wants to go about his day without hearing how great this new demigod ismain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairing: namseok
length: 190 posts


kismet or whateverthe one where yoongi and jimin keep accidentally showing up to halloween parties in coordinating costumesyoongi/jimin
side pairings: namseok & taekook
length: 7.9k words


a partridge in a pear treeyoongi and seokjin are roommates, and it takes a little holiday spirit for them to see that maybe they could be moremain pairing: seokjin/yoongi
side pairings: vminkook & namseok
length: 19.8k words


minjoon


main pairing


namjoon runs the online help desk for his university’s library and jimin attempts to seduce him through book requestsnamjoon/jimin
length: 3 posts


side pairing


yoongi decides to rent a cabin in the mountains to work on his next novel, and jungkook runs the general store in a nearby villagemain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: minjoon & taejinseok
length: 460 posts


taehyung sees a picture of yoongi on his friend’s instagram and predictably loses his shitmain pairing: taehyung/yoongi
side pairings: jinkook & minjoon
length: 27 posts


taejoon


main pairing


namjoon is a curator interested in taehyung’s art, and taehyung is an artist interested in namjoon’s uhhh intellectnamjoon/taehyung
side: yoonminkook
length: 14 posts


namkook


main pairing


jungkook has a bit of a problem in his apartment and namjoon is a very helpful landlordnamjoon/jungkook
side pairing: taegi
length: 15 posts


jungkook tries to romance namjoon through widgetsnamjoon/jungkook
length: 6 posts


yoonjin


main pairing


a partridge in a pear treeyoongi and seokjin are roommates, and it takes a little holiday spirit for them to see that maybe they could be moreseokjin/yoongi
side pairings: vminkook & namseok
length: 19.8k words


u make me wanna be a better man
a partridge in a pear tree sequel
it's been a year since they started dating, and seokjin decides to make a new year's resolutionseokjin/yoongi
side pairings: vminkook & namseok
length: 11.5k words


yoongi’s apartment is haunted and seokjin hates his jobyoongi/seokjin
side pairing: hopekook
length: 17 posts


yoonjin au where seokjin needs help with a caption and yoongi sends a text to the wrong chatyoongi/seokjin
length: 10 posts


seokjin gets turned into a sofa by a witch, and yoongi buys him at a charity shopyoongi/seokjin
length: 2.4k words


one shot


au where it’s sisterhood of the traveling pants except yoongi invented glassesseokjin/yoongi


2seok


side pairing


jungkook has to go to busan for 3 months to take care of his mom post hip surgery, and he starts noticing a shift in the shows yoongi watches on their shared netflix accountmain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: 2seok & vmin
length: 139 posts


jinmin


one shot


jimin is single and seokjin has a boatseokjin/jimin


taejin


side pairing


yoongi decides to rent a cabin in the mountains to work on his next novel, and jungkook runs the general store in a nearby villagemain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side: minjoon & established taejin into eventual taejinseok
length: 460 posts


jinkook


main pairing


i am jungkookguardians of the galaxy au; part 1
jungkook is groot and seokjin has an inconvenient crush
seokjin/jungkook
side pairing: vmin
length: 7.9k words


sleeping beauty au where jk lives with his 5 magic uncles and one day he meets a handsome prince while he’s picking berries but they end up being SUPER boring like not good at conversation at all, and after he sneaks away by creating an animal diversion he meets evil wizard sjseokjin/jungkook
length: 2.2k words


one shot


it’s 4/20 and jungkook sees a ghostseokjin/jungkook


jungkook never responds to any of his texts and seokjin needs attentionseokjin/jungkook


side pairing


yoongi forces his friends to send flattering pictures of himself to their group chat in a (not) subtle attempt to seduce namjoonmain pairing: yoongi/namjoon
side pairings: vmin & jinkook
length: 28 posts


yoongi is tasked with planning jinkook’s joint bachelor party, which unfortunately means accepting a helping hand from jk’s best manmain pairing: yoongi/jimin
side pairing: jinkook
length: 47 posts


the road aheadguardians of the galaxy au; part 2
Jimin attempts to cope with his escalating feelings for Taehyung, and makes the mistake of going to the other members of their team for advice
main pairing: jimin/taehyung
side pairing: jinkook
length: 9.3k words


yoongi is a shy tree nymph and namjoon is confused why trees keep appearing outside his apartment doormain pairing: yoongi/namjoon
side pairings: vminhope & jinkook
length: 29 posts


taehyung sees a picture of yoongi on his friend’s instagram and predictably loses his shitmain pairing: taehyung/yoongi
side pairings: jinkook & minjoon
length: 27 posts


sope


main pairing


yoongi just really wants to impress hoseok with his very good guitar playingyoongi/hoseok
length: 4 posts


side pairings


potato gun salesman seokjin tries to sell his product to unsuspecting potato farmer and self proclaimed potato advocate namjoonmain pairing: namjoon/seokjin
side pairings: sope & taekook
length: 64 posts


taehyung is an actual tentacle monster but jimin just thinks he’s got a kinkmain pairing: jimin/taehyung
side pairing: sope
length: 19 posts


everyone tries to get taehyung and jimin to understand that they’re in love with each othermain pairing: taehyung/jimin
side pairing: sope
length: 16 posts


yoonmin


main pairing


yoongi is tasked with planning jinkook’s joint bachelor party, which unfortunately means accepting a helping hand from jk’s best manyoongi/jimin
side pairing: jinkook
length: 47 posts


yoongi is famous rapper agust d, jimin is a popular tv presenter/singer, and after their awkward meeting on a music show, yoongi lowkey starts releasing extremely Explicit songs about a mystery manyoongi/jimin
side pairings: namjin & vhope
length: 140 posts


kismet or whateverthe one where yoongi and jimin keep accidentally showing up to halloween parties in coordinating costumesyoongi/jimin
side pairings: namseok & taekook
length: 7.9k words


one shot


jimin finds a creative way to share his boyfriend's words with twitteryoongi/jimin


jimin sees a picture of yoongi’s legs and has an emotional breakthroughyoongi/jimin


taegi


main pairing


yeah, i said itfive times taehyung gives yoongi a lap dance, and one time yoongi realizes it's not just platonicyoongi/taehyung
side pairing: jikook
length: 6k words


yoongi is goldilocks and posts ratings for all the beds he tries out, and when he finds the perfect one, not too hard and not too soft, he’s annoyed to find its current occupant refuses to leaveyoongi/taehyung
length: 7 posts


taehyung is a tentacle monster and yoongi is his disgruntled neighbor who keeps finding garbage on his doorstepyoongi/taehyung
side pairing: jihope
length: 30 posts


the kids are righttaehyung and yoongi get stuck on a ski lift together. twice.yoongi/taehyung
side pairing: namjin
length: 12.8k words


taehyung sees a picture of yoongi on his friend’s instagram and predictably loses his shittaehyung/yoongi
side pairings: jinkook & minjoon
length: 27 posts


(fish) child of mineyoongi has a strict no pets rule for their apartment, and taehyung just wants them to be fish dadsyoongi/taehyung
length: 6.3k words


the strawberry thieftaehyung falls over a fence. yoongi isn't too happy about trespassers on his farm.yoongi/taehyung
length: 6.2k words


yoongi doesn’t really think much of it when taehyung is having one of his more clingy daysyoongi/taehyung
length: 1.5k words


one shot


ace yoongi navigates tinder and meets an enamored taehyungyoongi/taehyung


three little pigs auyoongi/taehyung


side pairing


jungkook has a bit of a problem in his apartment and namjoon is a very helpful landlordnamjoon/jungkook
side pairing: taegi
length: 15 posts


better (with you)jimin accidentally texts jungkook a love confessionjimin/jungkook
side pairing: taegi
length: 5.6k words


yoonkook


main pairing


yoongi decides to sail across the globe for 6 months, and in his first port city he matches with jungkook on tinderyoongi/jungkook
side pairings: namjin & vmin
length: 477 posts


sequel to sailor au
jungkook just wants to make their 6 month anniversary as special as possible
yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: vmin & namjin
length: 32 posts


say it firstfive times jungkook says i love you, and one time yoongi says it firstyoongi/jungkook
side pairing: vmin
length: 23k words


jungkook has to go to busan for 3 months to take care of his mom post hip surgery, and he starts noticing a shift in the shows yoongi watches on their shared netflix accountyoongi/jungkook
side pairings: 2seok & vmin
length: 139 posts


twitter exists in ancient greece, jungkook is hercules, and yoongi is an annoyed citizen who just wants to go about his day without hearing how great this new demigod isyoongi/jungkook
side pairing: namseok
length: 190 posts


yoongi decides to rent a cabin in the mountains to work on his next novel, and jungkook runs the general store in a nearby villageyoongi/jungkook
side pairings: minjoon & taejinseok
length: 460 posts


coming in like a western wind
(sequel to the mountain au)
jungkook comes over to yoongi's cabin to fix a window and ends up staying the night.yoongi/jungkook
length: 7.4k


jungkook thinks his home is hauntedyoongi/jungkook
length: 18 posts


CURRENTLY IN PROGRESS: jungkook gets dumped and goes on a road trip to figure stuff outyoongi/jungkook
side pairings: nam2seok & vmin
length: tbd


one shot


yoongi and jungkook meet in the mosh pit of a concertyoongi/jungkook


rookie detective jungkook finds a picture of his boyfriend, famous rapper agust d, circulating around twitter yoongi/jungkook


yoongi just wants to share his favorite woodworking videos but he forgets to hide his tabsyoongi/jungkook


jungkook has some very particular feelings about his friendyoongi/jungkook


jungkook is a youtuber and isn’t really paying attention when he posts a pic of his new studioyoongi/jungkook


side pairing


radar detectortaehyung and jungkook start filming a documentary on an underground dance crew and taehyung develops an inconvenient crushmain pairing: jimin/taehyung
side pairing: yoonkook
length: 24k words


vmin get high and come to the group chat to get something off their chestsmain pairing: jimin/taehyung
side pairing: yoonkook
length: 22 posts


jihope


main pairing


jimin and hoseok watch a movie, and jimin decides to see how far he can toe the line of their friendshiphoseok/jimin
length: 4.1k words


lord of the rings au; jimin and hoseok don't always get alonghoseok/jimin
length: 4.4k words


side pairing


taehyung is a tentacle monster and yoongi is his disgruntled neighbor who keeps finding garbage on his doorstepmain pairing: yoongi/taehyung
side pairing: jihope
length: 30 posts


vhope


side pairing


yoongi is famous rapper agust d, jimin is a popular tv presenter/singer, and after their awkward meeting on a music show, yoongi lowkey starts releasing extremely Explicit songs about a mystery manmain pairing: yoongi/jimin
side pairings: namjin & vhope
length: 140 posts


hopekook


side pairing


yoongi’s apartment is haunted and seokjin hates his jobmain pairing: yoongi/seokjin
side pairing: hopekook
length: 17 posts


vmin


main pairing


taehyung is an actual tentacle monster but jimin just thinks he’s got a kinkjimin/taehyung
side pairing: sope
length: 19 posts


everyone tries to get taehyung and jimin to understand that they’re in love with each othertaehyung/jimin
side pairing: sope
length: 16 posts


the road aheadguardians of the galaxy au; part 2
Jimin attempts to cope with his escalating feelings for Taehyung, and makes the mistake of going to the other members of their team for advice
jimin/taehyung
side pairing: jinkook
length: 9.3k words


vmin get high and come to the group chat to get something off their chestsjimin/taehyung
length: 22 posts


radar detectortaehyung and jungkook start filming a documentary on an underground dance crew and taehyung develops an inconvenient crushmain pairing: jimin/taehyung
side pairing: yoonkook
length: 24k words


one shot


jimin is a tentacle monster in need of dermatology advice and taehyung is a physician assistant who momentarily forgets how to do his jobjimin/taehyung


side pairing


jungkook has to go to busan for 3 months to take care of his mom post hip surgery, and he starts noticing a shift in the shows yoongi watches on their shared netflix accountmain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: 2seok & vmin
length: 139 posts


yoongi decides to sail across the globe for 6 months, and in his first port city he matches with jungkook on tindermain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: namjin & vmin
length: 477 posts


sequel to sailor au
jungkook just wants to make their 6 month anniversary as special as possible
main pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: vmin & namjin
length: 32 posts


yoongi forces his friends to send flattering pictures of himself to their group chat in a (not) subtle attempt to seduce namjoonmain pairing: yoongi/namjoon
side pairings: vmin & jinkook
length: 28 posts


say it firstfive times jungkook says i love you, and one time yoongi says it firstmain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairing: vmin
length: 23k words


i am jungkookguardians of the galaxy au; part 1
jungkook is groot and seokjin has an inconvenient crush
main pairing: seokjin/jungkook
side pairing: vmin
length: 7.9k words


CURRENTLY IN PROGRESS: jungkook gets dumped and goes on a road trip to figure stuff outmain pairing: yoongi/jungkook
side pairings: nam2seok & vmin
length: tbd


jikook


main pairing


better (with you)Jimin accidentally texts Jungkook a love confessionjimin/jungkook
side pairing: taegi
length: 5.6k words


side pairing


yeah, i said itfive times taehyung gives yoongi a lap dance, and one time yoongi realizes it's not just platonicmain pairing: yoongi/taehyung
side pairing: jikook
length: 6k words


one shot


jimin and jungkook wear matching outfits all the time and it’s a total coincidence and definitely not an elaborate plan by jungkook to make jimin think they’re a couplejimin/jungkook


taekook


one shot


taehyung runs a parody werewolf watch blog, and jungkook thinks it’s realtaehyung/jungkook


side pairing


potato gun salesman seokjin tries to sell his product to unsuspecting potato farmer and self proclaimed potato advocate namjoonmain pairing: namjoon/seokjin
side pairings: sope & taekook
length: 64 posts


kismet or whateverthe one where yoongi and jimin keep accidentally showing up to halloween parties in coordinating costumesyoongi/jimin
side pairings: namseok & taekook
length: 7.9k words